3rd time tt i'm out,
faith n positivity is something i felt very needed in army, well to understand all things happened for good truly, it allows u to go through anything. i'm not being simple minded.. but realli tt's wat i felt in army, things like having a field camp of 5 days, 4 day n night was raining, fifth day had some lightning flashing but no rain eventually but later i tell u wat happen.. ok 4 night was de toughest, we dug a "grave" for ourselves, which is call shell scrape, den it rain so heavily, inside was already mashy during noon, as de soil become wet, den during the ngiht, it rain heavily non stop, so all grave became a fish tank, n being human n not fish, we weren't able to take the cold weather, super cold n wet all over, de boots inside, all water... i almost wanted to give out, to see MO aka medical officer,like the many others, there was about 30 holes around me, abt 10-12 gave up when de rain was pouring... i told myself to stay clear in my mind n be strong, so suddenly i remembered i got solid fuels given by army to cook, i took it out n asked all my shivering buddies, to my grave n we started a mini-camp fire, everibody rationing their solid fuel, i burnt n in charge of the fire till 4am from 1am, many fell asleep ard my hole, due to the warm.. n i went to slp at 4 after no more solid fuel left, it was realli cold, but i told myself de rain was for good, n i trust in my ppl i know who pray for mi, my grp didn't kana tekan much, thanks to kenrick n those who prayed for mi.. then next day it was fridae.. becos many ppl was sick n cannot take it anymore, somehow the management allow us to go back to company line aka my bunk on fridae night, instead of staying 1 more night in de grave... weee other ppl had 6 daes field camp mine onli 5, maybe the rain was for this... hahah

now tt i'm booked out, i feel hmm     rather sian i tink, nothing much to do on sg, i feel i dun realli got time to go out, missing my own service due to late release i was onli in sg at 3 so rather impossible to teleport there, unless i go there in my wet n muddy boots, hmm then i went home, n it seems no one is free to go out with, so practically stayed home..i oso onli realise that cg was on saturdae tis week only when i booked out, so it's like all my plans are gone n i got nth to do, other than gg service myself, i mean all my frens booked out to meet their gf n stuff.. well my plan everi week is to go to service n cg, n now that i can't do tt.. i feel rather lost at what to do,life seems to be stagnant...

i started to realise, positivity can onli bring u to a certain level, faith without work is dead.. it's like.. devil start to give me doubt, spiritual backbone mus be strong, to go through such dryness period. u mus realli haf a firm foundation lor, time is short, body is physically tired, but i will persevere, it's realli wrestling not with flesh n blood, it's all in my mind.. the constant struggles that comes..fellowship of the saints, is realli important.. 
dun worry, i'm strong .. jus that i'm expressing my thoughts.. trying to understand y ppl sae army life is tough time.. i start to agree.. but i believe wat doesn't kill u only makes u stronger

i jus hope i can go do some shopping tis afternn.. haha or catch a movie, let mi live a civilian life, it's been long since i caught a movie

 

realise i shld blog my army life down. so i will remember what i'm going through..

next week or rather in less than 24 hrs i will be marching to my field camp.. 8km route march...
they said field camp is a rather more xiong one, where more discipline will be required of me.. hmmm well i shall give them the benefit of the doubt and be mentally prepared first..

at first i heard a lot of stories.. abt how tough army life is.. well, not that i'm boasting.. but i feel army trains more on the mind than the body, most of my fren gained weight not so much of muscles, but the frequent meals.. hah.n snacks in the bunk

phyiscally the training is not really very tough, when it gets tough, u could always fall out, it's rather welfare inside.. the maximum pumping they give u, is 20 at one go, so they rotate between crunches pumping follow by jumping jack.. haha


so they can't play with ur body, they play with ur mind...

at the 1st week when everyone is still weak n cant do pumping, they punish u by giving u pumpings
2nd week we gotten use to pumping, they pump the whole platoon when u do something wrong, so mentally u feel guilty and stress that everyone kana...
now that we all whole platoon dun realli care abt pumping tgt, used to it..

3rd week they play with confinement, if u chao keng, or u fail ippt, they give u RT aka remedial training, so naturally ppl will wan to book out, n naturally ppl will do better for ippt n dun chao keng...

i'm not the kind that's rather self-motivated, i'm more like goal oriented.. so naturally i belong to the smart keng kind.. well not exactly naturally.. but i really dun see the need for siao on, i'm not the one always volunteering myself, not the first one to fall in or gather, neither am i the last to reach. n i do my best in all activity, showing that i'm de top few among be it, soc or ippt.. i do failed my ippt, but amazingly i run the top 10 fastest in my platoon, that i'm sure.. 
i believe one need to be smart, to survive, i think u can say i'm lazy, but i guess that's how poly life trained me, i'm someone that has a gpa more than 3 but i dun go to sch or classes, many green with envy, some more to the bu shuang side, i seriously has this dilemma between anti-conformity and culture mandate.. haha as much as i wan to blend it, i believe if i'm still the head and not the tail, i dun believe in using their methods..

all road leads to rome, so why must siao on be the only way to OCS.. 
4th week is field camp week. n we shall see abt that lolx! haha
i feel i will be someone dozing off at some trees in the heat of the noon, after doing my task..

well today was a great day, really great.. here comes my "bank account"

morning met up with guan feng, he came my hse.. then we went to eat kushinbo at suntec.. i will say i ate rather little if compare to the old me. but i ate till i felt uncomfortable and felt like puking, well the dessert's really nice.. omg. the tempanyaki had salmon, my fav. i ate like many kind of salmon today, the teppanyaki kind, the smoke kind, and the raw 1.. well had alot of spare rib too.. but the good part was jap dessert, i mean i like jap dessert but food wise i'm a hongkie, cos i'm not really into seafood other than salmon, i dun like things to plain when it comes to food, i like the saucey feeling.. of a muay fan , i like heavy taste~ like the dark sauce for char siew rice.. realli great..lolx~ i like the way they prepare tofu,or seafood or what ever.. so what i felt was.. given the same money i would haf prefer paris international buffet at marina square. but we tried tt before, so it's our 1st visit to kushinbo good experience, but i not much variety of food.. lolx~ but jap desserts are heavenly. green tea mua chee.. weee
ok went to repair my psp too.. contemplating whether to sell it.. n i realli wish to get HTC snap for my army fone..


ok den went home to put my psp, went out again, tis time to meet cg.. haha well by tt time i was already burping till to my really filled stomach, i feel like puking when i seee rice, so didn't ate at mr curry. haha. tried the curry sauce though.. not bad =D lolx anyway had drinks. n yu zhen treated me! weee =D exclusive for people sacrificing their hairs , the "army boys"..
well then after dinner we had a great time of fellowship at starbucks.. well the people shared really inspiring things. this is something that caught my mine, short n simple, yet nice and sweet... "love people,use things and not love things, use people" many a times we love things that we want, and in de process of possessing the things we make use of people around us, jus concern of our benefit at the expense of others.. they talked about being rich is a state of mind, well that to mi still need some times to digest, i believe we should train ourselves to be generous and helpful at all stage of our financial status, it's like tithing if we cannot give 1 dollar when we have 10 dollar, we can't give 10 thousands when we have 100 thousands..
nonetheless i do believe, finance is good, money is a tool, it's about how you use it and what u use it for, personally i feel, no one listens to the poor wise man, n seeking improvement and better standard of living is a part of God's will too.. God loves the poor and he loves you too.. nonetheless don;t let yourself be your only focus, let yourself be part of your focus becos of the benefit of others.. i believe it's all explain at 3john 2


and as we went home, i sat on sam's car with yu zhen n sam.. yu zhen manage to spot something i think many people don't realise.. 

i tot i was great at blending in. where by people the usual remarks is raymond is loud/funny/lot's of remarks and comment...
but she realise i was not engaging ... hmm i do know personally. i said it was a split personality. as i feel i need to know whether i'm saying is right , and shld i say it.. i take times to feel comfortable to speak my mind.. n i try not to join a conversation as i feel it's wise, as the less things i say the less mistake i make.. nonetheless the things i say people may not understand it and i'm lazy to repeat or think of ways to explain. sometimes i feel it's do not cast pearls to swine.. not in tt serious tone though...

hmm but after pondering i feel it's fear, and pride tt grip me.. i'm afraid of making mistakes, i fear i speak the wrong thing and made a fool of myself. i fear i'm not good enuff to start a conversation, what if i dunno how to continue.. 

i spot the problem, in fact i know them long ago, if u know me well enough.. but now the problem is i dun find a solution for them and i live by this barrier, which i feel it's not a good thing if i'm in the people's business, now i noe the rational behind greeters n children church ......

be myself, be confident

well, if thoughts can be valued, i guess my blogs rather more like a bank book, haha i rarely blog abt how i feel, rather much on what have happened.
so it's like u update ur bank book and u see all the transactions printed on the book, but u dun see how u spent it. i guess all becomes part of my memories, well the i have good memories, i choose to believe it's a gift from God, well it helps me in my studies, it helps me quote verses, it helps me to remember people's liking and disliking, different slang lingo to use among different frens. 

but i realise it's not like i dun have my thoughts, or my frens dun understand me, i realise i'm sort of in a wu-wo state.. shapeshifting has wearied me out, i realize it's one thing to want to be yourself, sometimes it's hard, tt's y i thank God oso that he dun reveals my thoughts to people.... some are really childish, some are really selfish some are really proud..i realize change is constant, i finally understand shapeshifting is not the appropriate words to use, it's more like renewing of my mind, where by i have the constant struggle between my thought-life and my flesh..

i have great dreams and i do want to achieve them. i plan out my life, but sometimes i live by my eyes, i can't see the path towards my dreams, gradually it became so dark that i no longer remember them, and they are chuck a side, everything the ray of hope comes, it show me a gleam of who i wanted to be, then i walk towards it again. i need to be focus..


one more thing that i realize in this short-lived freedom that i have.. that friends don't come and go. the fact that they come and go maybe u should ask, was there genuine friendship between u n that person before?

personally i feel friends are neither linked by distance nor linked by the duration of the friendship, they are linked by the heart. that's why people say wu xim or bo xim.. it's realli whether are we having tete-a-tete or are we having cliche talks.

why do i have such, remarks.. hmm recently i made friends, that i never knew before but barely one or two months we became rather closed closer than friends i have for 1 yr or 2. we noe how each one feels or think...
next was my primary sch frens..  it has been maybe like 6-7yrs since i last saw them, it jus felt like yesterdae, everione may have change in their circumstances but we are just like old neighbors we talked about anything under the sun,no offense taken even when got suan-ed haha just playing about. and yet they are really in the trench with you, they are people who walked by your side, i need friends who walked by my side, not friends that shout from the back "jia you raymond, we support you." and in difficult times, they are no where to be found.. lolx

my heart is getting heavier everyday, thought i'm already too bored and am "prepared" at least in my heart to go army.. haha now i totally understand how Jesus felt, haha if ur will allow, let this cup pass from me .. YKL if your will allows let NS pass from me.. lolx~
well then back to my point, at this stage i truly understand who really cares for me. and who belongs to the mere words kind.. there are people that say "Hey, oh you are gg to army? when? ok meet up soon ya? you plan" haha n never once the timing they are free.. nonetheless there are those who says ok don't care what you have, you are booked on that day, got to meet you before you go in" it's not like i'm going for long, like confine 2 weeks, but really sweet thought of them. 

n this is the funny part, people that totally booked me, some of them i have not seen them for months? or years? people whom i last saw at CNY gathering? lolx.. u be shocked.. n those that dun really care i may see them here n there, or chat with them online all the time.. lolx 

well vanity of vanities, choose your friends wisely.  =D i write this blog for my son, my grandson and my friends to see =D so they can be updated on my life, maybe in future i'm senile and dun remember, i can tell my grandson, ah gong use to do cheerleading, when i was young i can carry girls that are heavier than you, u know~ =D lolx and i can show him the proof,.. haha

p.s. sometimes when people buy you something, you really think that they think you need it. it's like a slimming package, a complimentary yunnam hair care, a pregnancy test kit, and motivation books.i mean i'm ok with humors but behind every just joking, there's a little truth behind it. so really what is the message you are telling me, giving me "this" ? lolx

kinda sad yet excited, today will be my last service before my army, decided to dress something loud, that shout BOOMZ. a hot pink top, didn't try before, but something i learnt, your first impression maybe your last impression, nonetheless the picture of the person on your mind will always be how you last saw him, until next time u all meet, well the next time i'm sure i'm tanned, fitter, hopefully sizzling hot~ lolx!(well this is my blog, freedom of speech?) haha

well yesterday's pm was great, revelations after revelations, just felt everything's really link and back to this word faith. long story but somehow Holy Spirit just show me like a flash back wow, suddenly all jus make sense, and i tell u, the illustrations Holy Spirit gives is the kind where by when u share it, ppl will go wow!

i talked to pastor tan yesterday =D haha happy~ i asked him about podcast whether does he have any.

then back to the topic fairy tale, well out of boredom i went to look out for shows.. haha.. and guess what i found.. a super nice anime-turn-drama show.. call buzzer beat. i'm episode 2, use to think it was just some slam dunk kind of show, but i guess it's more towards hot shot.. and once again renewed my love for jap drama.. people that knows me, knows that i kind of boycott korea stuff, cos since young i was super fan boy for japan stuff. well there was music station on channel 8's Goggles live timeslot,
there was all the good drama like beach boys, to love, hero and more, where takuya kimura was someone i looked up to, donning my levi's engineered jeans was something i was really proud of when i was young.. there was ayumi, speed, namie amuro, luna sea, larc en ciel.. all my favourites..........

until the korean drama started to come in, at 1st there was onli qiu tian the tong hua, or summer love story something liddat.. then they decided to take away goggles live so no more jap stuff, all are korean stuff.. i dun realli like korean shows, as the story either are rather sad where everyone dies, or the girls main lead like to act cute, or act gangster, totally not real life, stuff like my wife is gangster n stuff liddat..

well i always like jap show, because they show the genuine character and not some pseudo personality, they show how true love works, and why ppl fall in love, i mean such things may not be real anymore, like u see among ur frens breakup, two-timing and stuff. well u may same i'm naive or childlike but i choose to believe in true love overcomes, at least that's what's written in the bible. love covers a multitude..
i like to live in my own perspective world? well i choose to see my world from the truth from God's point of view and not what my eyes show me, even if it appears in front of me i choose believe life is good. =D positivity was what i learn last nite ..

positivity may not be faith, but faith is positive. there's a reason why 12 spies went to spy on a piece of land 4000 yrs ago from now, only 2 names lasted throughout all this time. because they saw the good and not the difficulties =D

woots i feel so good, to find out the another part of JB, not jus the wong ah fook street, or city square plaza .. i found out pelangi's pasar malam which opens only on tuesdae

its a totally different feel from singapore pasar malam's it's more like taiwan, where u get very nice local delights and food/snacks, jus that m'sia 1 is really "pasar" in terms of  pasar malam.. they got raw poultry fresh fish, and fresh vegetable straight from the farm.. wat more, the lady was cleaning the mud from the sweetpotato jus now.. wow n all is realli cheap.. lolx..some more de exchange rate has gotten to new height lolx =D like 5 cents more to 2.50

n i realli ate a lot..let's see i ate the fried food at one of the store.. got fried chicken thigh, 1 stick of fried wanton, 1 stick of fried fish tofu =D... i wanted to buy the taiwan fried chicken cutlet aka zha ji pai.. but long queue sian.. haha ate penang char kway teow.. hmm now then i understand the rational of getting back the "right" to cook the food for m'sia government.. it's realli different from singapore kway teow, they use the ipoh hor fun kind of kway teow and they got vegetables and prawn =D.. but i still prefer singapore's swim-in-oil's version kind of char kway teow, their's not so oily, believe it or not their road side store food are still health conscious(or maybe they wan to cut cost dun use so much oil) lolx.. oh they got black fried carrot cake too =D well then again i ate kueh lapis n coconut tart..went to their giant to buy toiletries for army. lolx. then home sweet home, went with my bro n my mum.. =D enjoyable day with my family..

hopefully next wed get to eat zhi cha b4 i go army with my family..i want butter-spare rib =D awwww lovely


i seriously can't bear to part, but i know this is the right thing to do, army, a memorable time of my life.

so pardon my long delay of  post, i love to blog.. only just i realize how to solve the problem..

anyway today was a good day, i clear up both my brother's n my cupboard.. i love things to be sleek,spic and span..i can don't move my furnitures for one year, nonetheless the people around will do the change.. so i guess i learnt to embrace change the hardway.. ok that's another story for another time..
i'm third
God 1st, people 2nd, i'm 3rd

time of my life is ticking down.. left one week and 2 days before i go in to army.. schedule rather's relaxing.. haha but there's still activity ahead.. i'm a kid inside of me.. like what pastor said, if u tell a kid that there's an outing on saturdae.. on monday he gets excited about it le. lolx true sunday i have a team 26 gathering.. like finally after graduating that's the 1st time gathering if u dun count pst bobby's grandmother wake cos not all turn up.. den monday is my cg farewell =D woots~ haha i guess this excitement is partly the reason why i so of detest aeroplanes.. oh well then.. haha i manage to meet up with lots of people during my past two weeks, there's visiting of serling at her shop, she realli change in appearance a lot =D in a good way, then there's my primary school friends who never changes, went gusto once, went to lynn's bdae so sort of met up with euphoria..den there was asmine's bdae so saw asmine and shandy, clarence bdae so saw my ex cg member and ex teammates =D the 1st batch of gusto aka 07 SP emerge.. weeee den i have been busy with children church for it;s children day event, follow by folding of stars, thanks to kenrick and tagore aka tan wei who helped citycare and me =D.. oh i send shaun isaac into army so met up with team 28 people, sort of gotten to noe them after i know team 27 people.. OH! i went to felicia josephine lee's bday then sort of got to know ariel clarence wahju and chuilaam more.. and i met up with ming xun and cheryl to chill at HK cafe. then it was vernon and vanessa wong for Wii and PS3 awww! it's a must-go-again event.. haha rock band 2 is really fun, i love to play the drums but my base is bad.. haha oh well we had great fun with rock band n not to forget rayman ravin rabbits.. oh and it was de 1st 2 times i led offering in my christian life =D weeee , i gave my 1st time to w362 =D hahaa cos i didn't get to lead during my mock cg i guess.. i think i'm still very kan chiong and i need to be accurate and relate to people's life, will jia you~ thank God for opportunity, i'm so happy that i contributed after i joined SOT..

there's really a quick update of september lolx~ thank God i'm enhance army (by enhance army it means u gotten gold or silver for napfa, during sch days and u join the army 1 mth later and release 1 mth earlier =D so it's 1 yr and 10mths instead of 2yrs) but i'm realli rather not as fit as fit before, i doubt i can pull 7 times chin up as of now.. 


ok haha before i leave my hse.. todae i'm gg for tuition then it's JB with my mum! weee
tml gym? , fold stars, submit stars at riverwalk , dinner with LTC peeps (long time no see)
thursday Children church's children day den blank
friday tuition,tuition?, cg , opm, supper, 1st bus home? =D
saturdae greeters,service,fellowship
sunday, team 26!!! 

so exciting it could live to 100 years, so exciting lalalalalalalalala

anyway there's this very nice song that i wan to post here.


if i walk would you run, if i stop would you come?
i'll try? 

guess that's for another time, another day.
life is full of season

 sd

sian i remember i had something i wanted to blog about but i couldn't access my blog.. for uber long days due to some virus(i suspect) that hacks my log-in password. which makes mi unable to log into my blog..argh ok.. i have been folding stars for citycare, was helping out for children church's children dae.den it was small talk with yu zhen kept me thinking on a few things, then it was, jailbreaking my ipod touch, hmm then talking abt todae, rather sad i got 3 question i can't solve during maths tuition rather irritating. so pai sei. sian... argh.. okok then finalli i'm leading offering in cg, quite nervous yet excited, dunno how long shld offering be, but i realise doesn't realli matter not that long after all.. okok then it was catch up with pri sch frens realli cool most of them nv change.. lolx looks or de way they talk, jus remind mi of good o' hokkien days.. haha.. then it's gg to be lynn's bdae tis saturdae.. quite excited.. gotta her gift now what's left is her *ahem* secret.. haha

actualli i'm quite lost at what to do next or what i realli wan in life. realli need to pray n do some-Spirit searching.. soul-searching dun work for mi.. 

wooo.. that was a long night.. a total of 220km mileage..

haha let's see 1st i drove my sister-in-law and brother to their "mini honey moon" cos they r literally married by ROM..
then i went to novena to meet the 2 'V's vernon and vanessa..had my long awaited subway club with extra cheese =D ... woo we had a fun time playing games like rock band 2 n rayman raving rabbits. hahaha.. all de noisy fun games.. super nice.haha played some basketball at their  And1 court .. haha realli lousy at basketball now, shoot so much onli score twice.. haha

den it was driving to chomp pang nasi lemak.. den fetch all de cool peeps.. den i brought them to yishun dam to chill.. really cool place.. to sit down n chit chat.. den went to pick timothy up at yishun, meanwhile supper again at yishun S11, den back to changi village to see TS awhile den went to have a walk at changi beach n the jetty to pulau ubin.. haha then went bedok reservoir mac to chill, de wireless at SG there realli got problem..haha chill awhile tired le.. den drive everi 1 home, i went to weipin's hse to rest, den morning went to shaun's camp to send him off.. his camp abit ulu and looks rather lack of facility unlike de bedok camp 2 that i went too.. haha realli cool.. okok den went home.. n tadah~ here i am.. with onli 45 mins of slp

thought i should leave a post at this special day, that comes once in every thousand years, which i kind of feel that there won't be another one =X

haha
ok today was my bro's ROM..

as usual i didn't run todae.. i think i nv run since mondae?
ok jog will be a better word.. hmm i realli detest running, realli wonder how my frens from cross country manage to even TRAIN for running, it's so boring(no offense) like u dun get to talk to people, running with people oso seems rather restricted either u r not on ur pace or the other person mus compromise, n chatting will get them out of breathe, a total. visual only sports, all u get to see is de car zooming pass u on de road. if u r inside maritchie , all u see is mud, path and trees well if u look attractive enough u may get to see monkeys.

ok let's not get out of point.. today was my Brother's ROM.. finally another family gathering..lots of things happened, good and bad. well thank God that there's more good stuff to blog about.. haha

ok got all dress up, wore my one and only suit haha think before i send to the laundry shall try wearing casual with it.. ahha.. like match a top or wat.. haha ok i thought i look suave.. haha this was what happen.. my bro went to change when we reach the registral .. i was with my then to be sister-in-law.. haha then this petite lady came and asked if i could speak chinese n i said yes.. woo so actualli she was from FM 95.8 .. came to interview ppl about their views on why they get married on this special day.. haha but she tot i was de bridegroom..which was so LOLX.. haha i jus look charming that's all.. i'm still young =D haha.. ok so i left my bro's gf to speak to her herself.. i took a step back n join my family members.. haha

the matrimony lady who say the vows for my bro was the same lady as my sis's haha so coincidental.. ok theirs is much shorter. like 10 mins over le.. unlike de christian wedding, where ppl sing, share word, n crack jokes, say something nice, n get them married.. still remember the joke abt 4 rings of wedding, haha proposal ring, wedding ring, enduring, suffering.. haha ok hope the later 2 dun happen to anyone.. ok then took pics..
den weee went to the fortune restaurant at chinatown.. tot is eat those fish n fins stuff.. quite disappointed at 1st.. hahha in the end it's dim sum buffet.. hahaha weee.. seriously i'm weird.. i prefer pizzas to sharkfin, i think i like to eat simple food, which gives mi a taste of home, and i realli have craving for them. things like black carrot cake, char siew rice,, west coast hainanese chicken rice, cheese naan, plaster prata, nasi goreng pattaya .. ok i'm a singaporean realli.. lolx.. i got to eat many many tan-tarts or u call them egg tarts.. wee as it was freshly baked, the egg was still piping hot on the inside, yum yum mamamia. haha i reali need to diet, cos i poured alot of pork ribs, har-gow and egg tarts down.. realli exciting..hahaha =D well happy day shld jus enjoy 1st think later..

hmm then rather kinda sian at the gg home part.. i fetch my sister n bro in law home.. n dad n mum was on board... after my accident.. my dad like to nags at my driving, n i'm not familiar with location to toa payoh the north areas.. then 1st i got to hear how they quarrel with which road to choose, my dad, my mum and my sis.. onli my bro-in-law noes how i feel.. haix.. den it was how i drive, my dad jus yell if i seem dangerous.. n his totally commanding me instead of guide/instruct.. well i understand it's my bad that i got into accident recently, and in my parents eyes, i'm always a kid.. but give mi a break. if u didn't like the idea of mi driving then simply ask brother to do it.. i can take bus home., or we can jus take cab. .. telling mi which lane to choose, how to turn, when it's safe to turn, when i'm de driver.. i sort of banged the other time becos i took the passengers instruction.. hey guys do u all remember i'm the one driving? i'm de looking at all 3 mirrors and road sign. n i didn't buy my license but passed myself..haix.. jus sian. i thank God for a full family, once that's close, it's ok if i'm not rich, but i pray that we can communicate and not yell. i'm thankful for the things i have, cos i have frens that have parents divorces,deceased or working oversea.. hmm i jus hope my family functions well and communicates well.. God bless my family.. ok enuff of complain.. i decided not to drive if my dad is ard.. =D i rather act blur.. haha

another thing to learn from my pro fren.. humility is not a denial of strength but doesn't mean we need to show it. haha
slightly different from my version but she's rather wise.. haha
just that todae she "ahemmmmmm" when i say i look suave =p i don't think she reads my blog all the way anyway =D

http://www.articlesbase.com/dating-articles/secrets-about-guys-that-girls-must-know-125128.html


i jus read de news paper todae, guys will become dumb when they see the girl they like. haha so funny guys will use their center part of the brain instead of the lower part of the brain.. haha slp details tell u another dae

i'm sorry to my livejournal folks.. that read my blog...

facebook is to tempting, the twitter-size post.. it's jus easy n not time consuming.. hahaha

realli if u wan to find out abt me n my thoughts do check out my profile at http://www.facebook.com/RaymondLum?ref=profile

haha i guess sometimes we are just lazy not willing to go through the trouble and settle for something easy i guess haha

wow~ i seriously feel the ugly truth is an excellent show.. 5/5 must watch.. realli ugly yet true.. hmm i guess it help mi to solve all the tangles in my heart.. realli we should stop pretending to be who we are not.. just be ourselves..it's better than making people fall in love for some fictional character.. just be urself and there will be someone that acccepts u for who you are.. your true self =D

at the end of the day, it's not about who people think you are, who you think you are. it's all about who you really are =D we need to know the truth.... sadly some of us, have been hiding/pretending our normal self that we are no longer sure, who we really are =D

i think jogging will release some 'feel good' hormones n i'm gg to do that now~ even though it's 9:15pm.. i should learn to feel good about myself..

really i'm not exactly 100% gentleman but like the H.S if u don't wan me around or is uncomfortable with me, i won't force my way in even though i meant well. peace is better than strife.

haha after reading ECC lolx. something shook me.. haha i'm in a world of paradox. we live in a parallel world? lolx.. well nonetheless i enjoy what i'm doing


paradox one : what you want to receive you need to give.. many of us think that to keep or to gather is the better way, but i learnt that you reap what you sow, before u receive the harvest, u must learn to let your seed fall to the ground to let it die, before it will grow =D.. the concept of sowing and reaping, everybody knows it. but what's usual response of people? reaping what they have not sown, greed is not good =X

paradox two: if you want to be the head of all you must be the servant of all.. whether u r a normal staff, or the boss of some large business corporation u need to serve. and if u r the boss all the more u got to serve, 1st of all business means "Service" that's where u get the term "service industry" of cos u need to serve, on top and apart of profits and monetary concerns, business is mainly providing a service for people.. and i'm sure the head of the government which is the president or the prime minister they are called "civil servants" , well-paid? prominent? yes still a servant.. i have learn that if u wan to be the greatest of all u need to be the servant of all =D where do u start? start by giving up seats to ppl who needs it more than you ( p.s needs it more than you, doesn't have to be senior citizens, pregnant, with kids, handicapped.. even some teenagers whose carrying lots of stuff.. be nice , serve..u dunno whose watching =D maybe it's the boss whose gg to interview u for ur new job~ well u never know )

paradox three: to have freedom means u got to restrict yourself even more. well with greater power comes greater responsibility, when we have greater ability we must learn when n how to use it appropriately, to maximise it's potential and put it to good use.. not for flauntings or boasting.. sometimes we practise humility by having self-control de fact that we can do something doesn't mean we have to do it, "Act blur live longer" ya? vanities of vanity, less is more at times, why do u wan to die before your time? haha remember others can we cannot, at times we ask ourselves, since we are saved, why do we bother to consecrate ourselves, why do we bother to fast and spend time with God? why can't we be like other christian, jus attend church every weekend and that's it? ya others can we cannot, we restrict ourselves.. just because we are saved by grace, doesn't mean we abuse the grace and use it sin =D
jus like how u dun take people for granted, we dun take God for granted, God is a person too =D He has feelings

more to come.. if i bother to blog

as i was reading the bible and thinking about my own life.

really i'm not wise in a lot of situations. i guess i got to be wise by speaking lesser, think more, listen more, find more wise people to talk to, search for instruction, observing people, don't bear grudges or offenses , let it go.. speak the truth in love, and love your friends and people around you. they are there for a reason, if you think your friends that made fun of u are bad, wait till u see office politics when u go to work.. be teachable, and always esteem others better than yourself..last but not least, don't be a kpo

i have a friend called kenrick who said something meaningful last nite on face book--> "Failures might be fatal but it's not final, it's the giving up that makes it final. We do not have enough time to commit all the mistakes that people make.. so learn from their mistakes."

life is too short for us to hesitate in fear everytime we want to try something, it's ok to walk slowly but never stop. we may not have time to learn from every mistake by experiencing it, but we don't have to. learning by observation is the best.. jump on to the rocks, your seniors did as they are stable.

i realise in life.. i lack patience. i speak too much, sometimes not in my area of concern, don't over stepped border, it's ok to be concern but it's not ok to be kpo. i need to be wise, sometimes it's not about what i say it's about how i say..
stress but i'll change